Question: My 19-year-old grandson studies Engineering and despite having an average of 9.25 in college, he lives tense and suffers from headaches because he set a goal of reaching 10. In addition, he spends hours doing physical activity because he wants to have a perfect body. (JEE, from Córdoba Capital)
The Royal Spanish Academy defines perfectionism as “the attitude that a person has who tends to seek perfection in what they do, improving it indefinitely without deciding to consider it ever finished.”
It consists, then, of an individual’s belief that perfection can and should be achieved.
In herself This search is not a disease as suchbut it can end up causing various health problems.
The search for perfection is a growing trend, especially among young people who have to face increasingly demanding and competitive environmentsoften with unrealistic expectations and with parents anxious that they not be left behind in the race to achieve what is supposed to be success.
According to the American Psychological Association, the pursuit of perfectionism has grown significantly since the 1990s, driven in part by the use of social networks that pressure young people and adults to measure and compare the degree of achievements achieved, whether on a physical level, in their student performance or in their work and economic activity.
Three types of perfectionism:
1) Towards oneself, with the individual desire to be perfect.
2) Towards the social environment, to satisfy the expectations that others imagine they have.
3) The one that is transferred to others, if they consider that they do not reach sufficient standards.
F. Miralles, professor of Psychology at the CEU San Pablo University, defines the perfectionist person as “one who at all times he is suffering and fosters his insecuritysince he wants to reach a perfection such that, either he believes he achieves it or he will not terminate the action he performs.
The normal thing is that you waste a lot of time in daily actions and have to neglect your personal life.”
Specialists focus on three types of perfectionism. Photo illustration: Shutterstock.This great pressure condemns suffering precisely for never feeling satisfied with the results of their actions and relates it to a lack of personal worth.
In reality, the perfectionist fails in his ability to clearly differentiate between wanting to do things in the best possible way and the need to achieve perfection, giving rise to very rigid and controlling behaviors.
The remarkable thing is that the perfectionist generates fuel for almost permanent anxiety since stress is inevitable, Your fear of failure leads you to prolong tasks that you never feel finished. and by not meeting their high expectations, their self-esteem can suffer, creating a risky vicious circle.
Prolonged anxiety generates emotional and physical symptoms.
On an emotional level, these behaviors can generate tension, exhaustion, devaluation and insecurity, especially in insecure people in whom fear of rejection makes them act based on how they think others would like it and not how they really are.
So if they don’t get what they want, they can feel a lot of dissatisfaction and frustration, and end up with depressive states.
On a physical level, digestive problems, tension headaches, migraines, various dermatitis, hormonal changes, among others, are often common.
As Voltaire said, “the perfect is the enemy of the good.”
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