Human beings often make differences between the way they advise others and the way they make their own decisions. This trend He usually is called Solomon’s paradoxin reference to those who ruled Israel in the 10th century, recognized for their wisdom, but who did not always apply it to their personal life.
One of the most famous stories about it It is the story of the so -called Solomonic trialwhen two women came to him disputing the motherhood of a baby.
Solomon, in an act of cunning, suggested to leave the child in two, which led the true mother to give up her claim To save your child’s life.
This story illustrates Solomon’s ability to make accurate decisions When he judged the problems of others.
However, according to the biblical tradition, Solomon did not apply the same wisdom in his personal life Since he had many foreign wives -more 500 -he was a wasteful, he thought little about leading a moderate life and allowed the introduction of pagan cults in Israel, which eventually led to the decline of the kingdom.
This contradiction between their ability to wisely advise others and their lack of prudence in their own decisions is known as Solomon’s paradox.
This term was coined in 2014 by the psychologist Igor Grossmann – Psychology Professor of the University of Waterloo, Canada – who performed Research on how people reason in own and others.
His conclusion was that, in general, People offer more sensible and rational advice when it comes to othersbut they have less clarity and objectivity when they face their own conflicts.
Said: “Solomon’s paradox is an asymmetry in decision -making or in the quality of deliberation when it treats its own problem compared to those of other people. ”
This would be explained for several psychological reasons:
1) When the situation of another person is evaluated, it is done from a distant and rational perspective.
2) When reflecting on a foreign problem, a logical and analytical approach is adopted, while With their own problems, emotions usually predominate that modify the criterion of how to decide.
3) When they face their own difficulties, They are justified with self -deception or arguments that reinforce previous beliefs -confirmation bias -, which makes it difficult to evaluate the situation objectively.
Therefore, it is common for an individual to suggest excellent advice to his friends about love relationships, but when they face problems in their own partner, he does it impulsively or irrationally, or financial experts who advise others on how to manage their money intelligently, but often make bad decisions with their own finances.
Grossmann recommended that people could improve their personal decision making if they tried Think about their own problems as if they were advising another persona method that received the name of “autodistanciating”, since clumsiness is usually better in the other than in oneself.
Or as the saying goes “tips I sell, but for me I don’t have.”