Consolation Jubilee: Lucía Di Mauro and Diane Foley Testimonian about how faith transformed pain into forgiveness

Within the framework of the jubilee of consolation, two mothers, the Italian Lucía Di Mauro and the American Diane Foley, shared how suffering for the violent death of their loved ones became transformed, thanks to faith, on paths of forgiveness, reconciliation and hope.

The testimonies were shared this Monday, September 15 during the prayer vigil in the Basilica of San Pedro, as part of the liturgy that Pope Leo XIV presided.

Lucía Di Mauro: “Pain can destroy or become a seed of good”

On August 4, 2009, Lucía Di Mauro’s life changed forever. Her husband, Gaetano Montanino, a 45 -year -old jury guard, was killed by a group of young people while working in the Plaza del Carmine, in the Historic Center of Naples.

“The pain was so great that my breath took my breath, as if it were underwater, buried under a very much -sized stone,” he recalls. “A pain that seemed infinite, a mark recorded in the soul. In that darkness I found strength in the faith, which did not erase the tears or anger, but allowed me to move on, walk even when it seemed impossible.”

Lucia understood that she had two options: letting the pain consume it or allowing it to become something new. “I learned that pain can destroy or become a seed of good, if we have the value of facing it.”

His experience as a social worker allowed him to see with other eyes. “Those boys were not the only ones responsible for the evil caused to my husband, but the result of our bad decisions, of our indifference to the most difficult neighborhoods, where young people have nothing and only know violence.”

One of the murderers, Antonio, was just 17 years old and would soon be a father. After turning years in a minors correctional, he sought the meeting with Lucia to apologize. She confesses: “Before seeing it, I was afraid, because I imagined him as a monster. In front of me, on the other hand, I found a boy who was trembling, who cried, who asked for forgiveness, and the only thing possible was a long hug.”

From that gesture was born in it the conviction that pain could transform. “Forgiving does not mean erasing what happened, but freeing yourself from hatred, not reducing the other to the crime committed. Reconciliation requires an active encounter, and that was what allowed Antonio to build a new life and to give meaning to the death of my husband.”

Today, with the support of Fr. Luigi Ciotti and the Libera Association, Lucia takes his testimony to schools and prisons, convinced that “every boy who is wrong, every young man who falls, can be reborn if someone believes in him, if someone tends his hand, if someone really accompanies him.”

“Spilled blood is never in vain if we know how to transform it into good. God’s consolation passes through the hands of those who choose to love, accompany, testify,” he emphasizes.

Diane Foley: “In Christ, evil can become something good”

The American Diane Foley, mother of Catholic journalist James Foley, also narrated how faith was support in her path of pain.

In 2012, his son was kidnapped in Syria while working as an independent journalist. “For almost two years he was deprived of food, tortured and, finally, publicly decapitated in August 2014, for being an American and Christian journalist,” he recalled.

“I staggered under the weight of that loss, insecure if I could move on,” he said. “In those dark moments, I picked up desperately by the grace of not becoming bitter, but of being merciful and able to forgive.”

In 2021, two of the jihadists who had kidnapped and tortured Jim were arrested and taken to trial in Virginia. Alexanda Kotey, one of them, declared himself guilty of the eight charges of kidnapping, torture and murder, and surprisingly offered to meet with the families of the victims.

Foley tells about: “I requested a meeting with Alexanda because I knew that Jim would have wanted to understand why he had radicalized, and I wanted to share with him who had been Jim. As the date approached, I began to doubt, while others advised me not to meet him, saying that he would only lie to me.”

However, she tells that, after much prayer and receiving the support of a friend and some lawyers, this meeting became possible. “Although at first it was uncomfortable, the three days of encounters became moments of grace. God gave me the grace to see him as a sinful brother in need of mercy, like me,” says Foley.

From that experience the James W. Foley Legacy Foundationwhich has promoted changes in the US host policy and enables journalists in security. “This work has been deeply healer for me. It is proof that, in Christ, evil can become something good,” he said.

Both Lucia and Diane agree that faith allowed them not to be trapped in hatred or revenge. “The pain is huge, but it can become strength,” says Lucía. And Diane adds: “Each of us loads a cross … but when we invite Jesus to walk with us, there is always hope and healing.”