Can a Catholic attend a wedding between homosexuals?

The invitation to the marriage of a relative or friend is usually a reason for joy, but for many Catholics, being invited to a wedding between people of the same sex can generate a deep internal conflict. How to reconcile family or friendly loyalty with church teachings? Is it possible to show love and respect without compromising faith?

This dilemma, increasingly common in our society, tests the awareness of the faithful and raises complex questions about the practical application of Catholic doctrine in delicate personal situations.

The Catholic Church It is clear in its position on marriage y Homosexualitybut the application of these teachings to personal situations can be challenging. On the one hand, the Church affirms that marriage is an exclusive union between a man and a woman.

On the other, call the faithful to treat homosexuals with respect and compassionwhich generates difficult questions for Catholics who face the invitation of a same -sex marriage ceremony.

Even the Vatican published in December 2023 the controversial declaration Confidence in supplicating On the pastoral sense of the blessings of the Dicastery for the doctrine of faith, which opened the possibility of “blessing couples in irregular situations and same -sex couples, without officially validating their status or altering in any way the perennial teaching of The Church on marriage. ”

This statement, approved by Pope Francis, was a change in the Church’s approach to this issue, although maintaining a clear distinction between these blessings and the sacrament of marriage. The document generated various reactions within the Church, from acceptance to some controversy.

So, for “charity”, can a Catholic attend a homosexual “marriage”?

For Father Hugo Valdemar, who a few years ago was a penitentiary canon – continues with the power to acquit the most serious sins, with the exception of those who are reserved for the Holy See – “If there is a straight consciousness the answer is not ”

“Above blood or affective ties is the truth, and even more the revealed truth in which God arranged that marriage can only occur between a man and a woman,” he says.

For his part, Fr. Mario Arroyo, doctor in Philosophy for the Pontifical University of the Santa Cruz and author of the book The church and homosexuals: a false conflicthe said that this situation “is not a dogma of faith, that is, it is a prudential issue, an application of a moral criterion that does not necessarily have to be followed.”

“This case, the assistance to the gay marriage of a loved one, can be framed within what is known as the cooperation of evil. In this case, it would be a material cooperation to evil, ”he explained.

“In principle, we must try to avoid cooperating evil, because we have an obligation, conversely, to cooperate the good within society. In that context, the first attitude is reluctant, that is, trying to participate whenever there is no irreparable damage to family living or friendship, ”he added.

“It seems to me that the criteria that can be used in the case of marriages between the same sex is analogous to that of the second civil nuptials or weddings that are only civil and non -religious,” he said.

“If participation can be avoided, it is better, explaining the reasons for people, in this case to the parties, of why it goes against the consciousness and beliefs of a person,” he said, but warned that “yes This attitude will follow very large damage, a total separation, a total breakdown of family coexistence, exceptions can be considered. ”

In such a case, he said, this cooperation with evil would have to be material, never formal. That is, never manifest as joy or joy for the fact that two people of the same sex contract ‘marriage’, but simply attend a ceremony taking into account that the large damage of the complete rupture of communication cannot be avoided. ”

In that sense, he warned that “there are differences between attending as a simple spectator and having an active role”, so “it is preferable to avoid having an active role as a sponsor or as a witness.”

Father Valdemar is more sharp in this regard. “Neither of the two things is (something) lawful, but it is even worse to participate as a witness of a pseudo marriage like the one between people of the same sex.”

The danger of “scandal”

For Father Valdemar, who for more than 15 years was communication director of the Archdiocese of Mexico under Cardinal Norberto Rivera, the problem of attending a ceremony like that is to produce scandal.

“Participation in such an act cannot be neutral,” he said. “It is a validation and justification of an act that in itself is intrinsically immoral and contrary to the law of God,” he added.

Fr. Arroyo coincides with this risk, so “in general, he must tend to avoid participating in these ceremonies.”

“If it is impossible to do so because the breakdown that would happen would be irreparable, the rupture of family communion or communion of friendship, you can participate in the ceremony, but knowing that the price is that some people can be scandalized,” he said.

In the case of choosing not to participate in the ceremony, Fr. Arroyo advised “explaining with charity to the interested parties and manifesting in some way or another a detail of closeness with the person who is a relative of one and who is involved in the ceremony ”

“A rosary can be given to him, a Bible can be given, he can be invited to eat (…) that is, some or another form of interpersonal communion participation that does not include the legitimation of sexual coexistence between two people of the same sex ”.

In this approach, Fr. Valdemar coincides: “To show closeness and affection there are many moments in coexistence either daily or occasional, the loved one must be made to understand that although he cannot attend an act like civil marriage that does not mean that rejects his person, and that he can count on his proximity and support. ”

What to deal with the dilemma?

Before the dilemma of attending or not attending such a ceremony, Fr. Mario Arroyo advises “bringing the issue to prayer, to his personal prayer, to weigh calmly, with serenity, dispassionately, the pros and cons This participation ”.

“The cons are very clear: that scandal can be caused and can give the impression that it blessed or agrees with which two people of the same sex marry,” he said.

“On the other hand, assess whether that breakup, if that lack in the ceremony would not be understood by the interested parties and would be interpreted as a total breakdown of relationships, which would prevent in the distant near future approaching these people to communion with God” , he added.

For his part, Fr. Valdemar encouraged Catholics who see themselves in this situation not to be left “just because of their feelings or social and family pressure, (therefore) are the most important Christian principles. In the long run, preserving these principles is what can help the most. ”